I hope you stayed sober and smart today.

I left work early today because today is one of those days where you just know there are dozens of idiots in local bars who think it's okay to get staggeringly drunk and then drive home.

I don't want to be on the roads with those idiots.

And for the record, it's not okay to get staggeringly drunk and then drive home. If you want to get staggeringly drunk, get someone who is sober to drive you home.

*

You can click on these links:

• "Oh yea, well I have a bomb and I'm gonna do the jihad thing!!!  ....Ouch! Wait, I was just kidding! I'm sorry! Please stop beating me up!"



• Only in Florida.



• The Japanese are getting weirder by the minute...



• Ladies, trust me, you look good to us just the way you are. Stop doing things that make you look ridiculous.