They won the series against the Yankees.

Now all they have to do is win all the other series they are scheduled to play between now and the All Star break on July 14th. If they can do that, they might still be playing baseball come October.

Tonight they start a series against the Cubs, a National League team that is actually playing worse than the Red Sox are right now.

*

So the Supreme Court (not to be confused with Diana Ross and the Supremes) ruled that the federal government violated the First Amendment in regards to religious freedoms. The case they heard involved a large retail operation that is run be an extremely religious family who stated uncategorically that despite what the Affordable Care Act says, they would not provide birth control to their employees since it was against their religion.

Having made my religious beliefs crystal clear in the past (I believe you are entitled to your religious beliefs just keep the damned things to yourself), I feel totally unqualified to speak about this issue. Fortunately for you, being unqualified has never stopped me in the past and it certainly won't stop me now.

The federal government has become too damned invasive in our lives and it's about time Diana Ross and the Supremes put it in it's place.

*

I didn't find anything of interest and I'm tired. You can go find your own links while I fall asleep while watching baseball.

They won last night

Ross and Napoli both hit home runs last night and that was all they needed to beat the Yankees 2-1.

They are still in second-to-last place in the AL East and seven games under .500 so it's not like last nights win assured them a spot in the playoffs.

Tonight's game is on ESPN which is another way of saying, "Tonight's game is on too late for me to watch it."

*

It is my understanding that they are still playing soccer, or as we Americans like to call it, "soccer". The American team isn't scheduled to play until sometime in September.

I'm not sure when they are scheduled to play but it's not today. Maybe it's tomorrow.

*

The Dog has a girlfriend. I keep telling her that he's not really interested since he's not packing his boys anymore but she doesn't care. She gets all excited and her tail starts going every time she sees him coming down the road. And despite having one of those electric fence things, she runs out to see us.

She really must like him if she's willing to take a shock in the neck to get over to see him...

*

Try these links:

• Thank goodness criminals are "brilliant" because it makes it so mush easier to catch them.



• I'm betting this is pretty common in Alaska.



• Only in Florida.



• Key phrase in this story: "...the mere proximity to the Capitol created the series of events that led to an emergency switch being flipped..."

I give up

The Red Sox got whomped last night and so far tonight they aren't doing any better. I've about had it with them not hitting the baseball.

Might be time to start watching the Discovery Channel instead of NESN.

*

Here are some links:

• Why?



• It's a booby bounce house!



• Apparently they aren't big on gun laws in Oklahoma.

Baseball will be played

But I won't pay a lot of attention to it because Red Sox/Yankees games just aren't as exciting as they used to be.

With both teams essentially struggling to maintain a presence on the field, the games don't seem to have the same level of excitement and tension they used to have.

It's kind of like watching two little league teams go at.

*

Here are some links:

• Nice job Captain.



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "4:33 p.m. A Bigfork woman reported that nearly a dozen naked kids were jumping off the bridge on Bridge Street. She believes they are all on drugs."



• Pffftttt. Technology.

I had a rather lengthy day today.

And I'm not complaining because a full day makes for a fast day.

*

There is some kind of soccer thing going on down in South America and I guess the United States team lost to the Germans today.

I'm not sure what that really means in the grand scheme of things because the last time the United States went up against the Germans, we kicked their ass and split their country into four pieces.

*

And thus ends today's post.

The Red Sox are in a world of hurt.

They lost 3 out of 4 to the Athletics and they are currently down 2 out of 3 to the Mariners. This is not a good record and it is pushing them deeper into a situation where they can all plan on taking their vacations starting Monday, September 29th.

*

There was a terrible accident in town last night. I can't imagine the grief those families are going through and I pray to God that I never have to go through it.

And to my good friend John, all I can say is hang in there. I know it's not easy but you are one of the best at what you do and the families will rely on you. They will look to you for the answers they need and the information you give them will provide some level of comfort and closure.

*

You might enjoy these links. Or not. Whatever:

• Only in New York City.



• At some point in the future, I imagine this will be my wife and myself.



• My only question is, "What happened to her face?"

Busy day.

My eldest came home last night because he had doctor/dentist appointments today and then I had to drive him back to Boston this evening.

The reason I had to drive him back is that it seems that his car, the 15 year old Deer Hunter, is no longer a viable mode of transportation. He likes to say, "I'm driving a car that is old enough to get it's own learners permit."

All things considered, that car took us through 15 years & 4 drivers and it cost less than $30,000 when we bought it brand new.

I'd say we got our moneys worth out of it.

*

So speaking of doctors appointments, our eldest met with his oncologist and he was told, "Your blood work is negative and as much as I enjoy our time together, I don't want to see you again until June of next year."

This, for us, is great news and it made us all very, very happy.

It was one of those days that makes me smile.

*

Here are some links:

• This is why we need to re-open the looney bins.



• Key phrase in this story: "I bet you don't have one of these."



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal Of The Week.

Long Day = Short Post

Too much going on for me to spend a lot of time on the interwebs.

I did manage to dig these up:

• Here's your Naked Guy In The News story.



• Only in a Florida Walmart.



• Here's a headline I never expected to see.

I have a plan

There were three home runs hit in today's baseball game and one of them was hit by David Ortiz. The other two were hit by David Ross and Mike Napoli.

Ortiz struck out once, popped out once and grounded out twice the other four times he was at bat and never played a position during the game.

Naploi walked, singled, struck out and grounded out his other four times at bat and played all 10 innings at first base.

Ross singled and struck out twice his other three times at bat and played all 10 innings as the catcher.

So tell me again what does Ortiz brings to the team....

If I was the General Manager of the Boston Red Sox, this is what I would try to do:

1. Trade David Ortiz, Will Middlebrooks & Felix Dubront for a first baseman who can hit and a couple of minor leaguers who can play the middle infield.


2. Make Napoli the DH with an occasional stint at first.


3. Put Brock Holt at third.


4. Make Ruby De La Rosa a starter.


5. Trade Stephen Drew for a player to be named and offer to pick up half his salary.


6. Get Shane Victorino healthy and see if he can still play baseball.

That's what I would do.

*

Have I mentioned that I am trying to grow grass again?

I put a chicken wire fence through the middle of my backyard in the hopes of keeping The Dog out of one half.

It's proving difficult because he's a pretty bright dog and keeps finding ways in but I think he's getting the hint.

And by "hint", I mean my yelling at him and calling him a sneaky little sh!t and telling him to get the hell out of there!

So the plan is to keep the fence up for the entire growing season in the hopes that by keeping The Dog off the young grass, it will take and one day, we will have have a backyard instead of a dirt parking lot.

If this works out okay and I end up with some semblance of a lawn by fall, next year I'll do the other half of the back yard.

*

Try these links:

• Yea, I'm thinking he deserved it. Idiot.



• Never mess with the Special Forces. Even after they've retired.



• So much for top floor privacy in the girls dorm...

It's time for David Ortiz to retire.

He has two things to do - hit the ball and then run to first.

He isn't hitting the ball and he's never been able to run.

In other words, he isn't doing his job. And when you reach a point in your life where you aren't doing your job anymore, it's time to retire.

*

Here are some links:

• Only in Pennsylvania.



• Don't screw with Patty and Don Kearney. They will mess you up.



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "9:44 a.m. A Ridgeway Drive woman reported that people from Shady Lane stole Geoffrey, her five-foot tall stuffed giraffe. The giraffe was returned to its owner."

No combat troops

That's what the man said. He made it clear he would not be sending combat troops to Iraq. He said it loud and clear into a microphone in front of a bunch of reporters.

So I guess these guys aren't really troops and they aren't really being sent into a combat zone.

This is just as good as all those times he said, "If you like your healthcare plan, you'll be able to keep your healthcare plan."

Can someone please explain to me why our government is so quick to send our boys into harms way for that sh!thole of a country? Why do we care? I don't see the Swedes falling all over themselves to send their boys over there to get killed. I don't see the Argentinians packing their kids up and making them go over there.

Why are we going over there?

This is like Vietnam all over again.

*

The Dog and The Pig like to hang out together.

That little pig belongs to one of my neighbors and he loves The Dog.

And believe it or not, The Dog loves him.

They hang out together for a few minutes, run around like little kids and then The Dog decides that he needs to finish his walk so off we go. Sometimes The Pig tries to follow us but his owner scoops him up and tells him no.

I live in a pretty cool neighborhood.

*

You can click on these if you like:

• Welcome to my little town...



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Day.



• Key quote in this story: "That's not quite right is it?"



• Must have been a teenage raccoon.

The new way.

I'm being told that the new way is new so it must be better than the old way because the old way is old.

My response is, "Whatever".

*

• First they refuse to negotiate with us...



• Then they demand that we leave...



• And now they are pleading for us to come back...

If we are smart, we stay the hell out of it.

But we are not smart, are we....

*

Here are some links that are not related to the current situation in Iraq:

• I kind of wish Tom Cotton would run for President of the United States.



• You need a license to drive a car, you need a license to own a dog and you need a license to get marries but they'll let any a$$hole become a parent.

Long Day = Short Post

Actually, today is a non-post kind of day.

How's that withdrawal from Iraq going?

I have stayed quiet on the whole Iraq situation because my opinion will piss of both conservative and liberals equally. But now it's gone far enough for me to piss everyone off and move on:

George Bush the 2nd was an a$$hole for going in there and killing Saddam Hussein. Those people are tribal and they needed a strong man to hold them together.

Barack Obama was an a$$hole for assuming the Iraqis were capable of holding off the muslim fanatics. He thinks they can elect their leaders and everyone will be happy.

Turns out both those idiots are wrong and we should have followed the lead of George Bush the 1st when he moved in, made his point and then moved out.

Want to know what I think we should do now?

We should do nothing.

Let things happen the way they are going to happen and stay the hell out of it. Let the crazies do whatever they are going to do and if they decide to move beyond the boarders of Iraq, nuke them back to the stone age.

*

Here are some links:

• Only in Florida.



• Oops.



• I used to do that as a kid.

Maybe if I stop talking about them.

Maybe that's the problem. Maybe if I stop talking about the Red Sox, they'll start winning.

Maybe it's my constant prattling on about how this one should do that and that one should do this that's causing them to falter and not score any runs.

Either that or they suck and nothing I can do will change that....

*

Once again, today was one of those days that was pretty overwhelming. That means I'm tired and don't feel like spending a lot of time on this.

What say we just go look at a couple of links:

• I don't remember there being any garage scenes in that particular movie...



• I find it hard to believe that Massachusetts isn't on the list.

Another loss.

Once again, the Indians beat the Red Sox.

Things just aren't looking all that good for any kind of successful season.

*

Check out these few links:

• Happy Fathers Day!



• Lurleen from Hobart, Oklahoma writes, "My boyfriend of 6 weeks was killed in a terrible steamroller accident while he was working as a sewer reamer down in Bolivia. I'm hoping that you can play his favorite song so I can think about him. It was Convoy by C.W.McCall."



• I think my favorite is "Junior Lollipops"



• They make the perfect couple

They lost.

The Red Sox are currently five and a half games ahead of the Rays, four and a half games behind the Orioles, five games behind the Yankees and eight games behind the Blue Jays.

I doubt that the Blue Jays will be in first place by the All Star break but I also doubt the Red Sox will pick up any games on them. In other words, the Blue Jays won't be in first place but the Red Sox won't be either.

*

Well, the lawn got mowed, the basement got cleaned and two of four air conditioners got installed.

Tomorrow I'll put in the other two air conditioners and repair the carpet on the porch so we can sit out there and relax.

Life is good.

*

You might like these:

• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal or the Month.



• Only in Florida.



• You have got to love dogs.

Another long day.

I managed to get out of work at a decent hour today but had to run over to Baystate to pick up a copy of my daughters immunization records.

Can someone explain to me why a college in North Carolina needs the medical records of a woman who is taking her courses online from her home in Massachusetts?

It's not like she can infect anyone with some disease over the internet.

*

So the Red Sox beat the Indians last night and have advanced to....

....second to last place.

Which is were they seem to be stuck.

*

You might like these links:

• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Week.



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "8:09 a.m. A Bigfork man claimed that his friend's girlfriend pawned his stolen rifle."

I got nothing.

It was a very long day with almost no feeling of productivity.

In other words, I feel like I wasted my entire day plus a few extra hours.

Now, I'm going to watch a few innings of baseball and fall asleep.

There are no links today.

One in a row.

So the Red Sox managed to score one run last night and that was enough to beat the Orioles.

Hey, take 'em any way you can get 'em....

*

The next person that asks me what I think we should do about all the gun violence is going to get slapped.

Guns are none-living things, incapable of experiencing emotions. They can't get tired, they can't be happy, they can't be sad and they can't be violent.

People are violent. As a matter of fact, I would guess that humans are the most violent species on the planet.

For instance, we are the only species that kill each other because of what we imagine some special invisible deity is telling us to do. We are also the only species that kill each other just for the heck of it.

We are an extremely violent species and for the longest time, that violence was held in check by social mores.

Now that that we've given every anti-social behavior a name and deemed it a "disease", those mores are gone. Every type of behavior is acceptable because it's a "disease". And since we can't blame someone with a disease for having that disease, we have to blame something so we blame the guns.

Apparently not only are we a violent species, we are a stupid species as well.

*

Here are a couple of links that you can visit:

• Only in Florida.



• I'm assuming that either drugs or alcohol or possibly both were involved.

None in a row.

Man, the Red Sox are not doing well. Not well at all. As a matter of fact, they are starting to look a lot like the 2012 team that we all blamed on Bobby Valentine.

*

I had another late day but it wasn't because of a lot of work. It was because I had a dentist appointment this morning which caused me to get into work very late.

I chipped a tooth yesterday and the dentist wanted to evaluate it to determine what needed to be done.

Next week, I'll be getting it repaired so I can once again eat food using the right side of my face.

*

Here are a few links:

• Only in Florida.



• Here's your Naked People In The News story.



• Even though it doesn't specifically say it, I'm betting alcohol was involved.

One in a row.

Despite the fact that I fell asleep in the 5th inning, the Red Sox managed to win last night.

Yay!

*

Today was an interesting day at work.

For those of you that know what Lean Six Sigma is, let me just say that we started a new way of working today and are we all overjoyed about it.

For those of you that have no idea what Lean Six Sigma is, might I suggest you go to Netflix and watch the movie Gung Ho starring Michael Keaton.

*

So anyways, it was a long day for me and now it's over.

The Red Sox will be playing baseball at their normal hour and I might be able to watch more than a few innings.

Then again, maybe not.

*

You can try these links out while I try to stay awake:

• Heck of a way to start your prom.



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Month.



• Key phrase in this story: "...an invention of lonely scientists..."

ESPN can kiss my rosy red a$$

Today's baseball game isn't on until 8:00 tonight and that's because those brilliant programming gurus over at ESPN say it can't start until 8:00 tonight.

For some reason, they think they get a bigger audience if they wait until their primary viewer (old guys like me) is just about to fall asleep.

Morons.

*

While I watch the news followed by my DVR'd copy of Pawn Stars followed by two or three innings of the Red Sox, you can click on these links:

• Only in Florida.



• Well this is interesting....



• You gotta love dogs.

Nice day for a drive

We took a trip up to Keene today to visit with our youngest. We delivered a few things, took him out to lunch and then headed home.

At least I thought we were heading home....

First we stopped at a leather store in Winchester, NH under the guise of me getting a new wallet.

When we left, I had a new wallet and my wife had a new leather coat.

Then we stopped at Kringle Candle in Bernardston under the guise of my daughter buying some loose tea.

When we left, we had tea, candles and fudge.

So basically, it was a pretty good day and since he was left by himself today, The Dog got two walks and two cookies.

He was a pretty darned happy dog and I got a new wallet.

*

Here are some links:

• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminals of the Week.



• Man, he is either extra fat or he has the deepest "innee" ever.



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "9:17 a.m. Two drunken Bigfork boys went to school after a morning of heavy drinking. A deputy picked them up in the principles office and released them to the mercy of their parents."



• This isn't hazing. This is a normal night for most college students.

Long Day = Short Post

It was a long, long day at work.

When I got home, I mowed my lawn and then I took The Dog for a walk.

Now, I'm going to watch the Red Sox and fall asleep in my recliner.

*

You might want to click on these:

• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• Key phrase in this story: "Holy crap, is this real?"



• Here's your Naked Guy In The News story.



• Only in Florida, or some other "sovereign state".

Once again, none in a row.

They are on a day off today while they travel to Detroit to play the Tigers. I have a feeling this three-game series is not going to go very well for them.

The guys on the Dennis and Callahan show have already declared the season lost and are barking that the Red Sox management should focus on building a winning team for next season. I'm not quite as pessimistic as them and I'm holding out hope that the Red Sox will start playing like they can and winning games.

Then again, they do kinda suck...

*

Try these links out:

• Twenty four hours? I bet it got a little stinky in that car.



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Day.



• Key phrase in this story: "Several people were seen taking pictures and video of the woman before police arrived."



• Wasn't this a scene in Trading Places?

Still none in a row.

They just can't seem to overcome the Indians.

Right now, there is a rain delay that I think is going to turn into a postponement.

*

Here are some links:

• Some people should not be allowed to have children.



• Holy Cow!



• Because everyone needs a tactical tie.



• Okay, I don't really care for gospel music but I'm also pretty sure this is a bit of an extreme reaction.

None in a row.

Last night, the Indians ended the Red Sox winning streak at seven.

I hope they start a new winning streak tonight.

*

Here are some links

• Chris sends us this "Only in Florida" story.



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Day.



• Sperm-Inspired Robots would be a great name for a 1970's made-for-tv SciFi movie.



• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• Only in Florida.

Eight in a row???

Tonight the Red Sox are in Cleveland to play the Indians. I'm hoping they win because the Indians aren't the best team in the league. They are currently in fourth place in the ALCentral and half a game behind the Red Sox in the American League.

Trust me, I suspect that throughout this evening, I will be having many conversations with the Red Sox via my special coaching TV.

*

Here are today's links:

• You gotta love dogs.



• This is why some creatures eat their young.

Seven in a row.

Last night's ball game was a great baseball game. No drama, no hissy-fits and no bulsh!t. Just good baseball.

Today's ball game was much of the same and I'm pleased to say that the Red Sox currently have the longest winning streak in Major League Baseball.

And yes, a seven game winning streak is way better than a nine game losing streak.

On the other hand, I wouldn't want to be John Farrell this weekend.

After watching Brock Holt play third base like a champion, Farrell now has to figure out how to keep that kid on his team when Stephen Drew returns on Monday.

Every young kid the Red Sox have brought up is playing each baseball game like it was the seventh game of the world series but you can't keep everyone on the roster. That means that Holt is a target to be sent back down to Pawtucket.

There is, however, one other possibility....

Instead of sending Holt or one of the other rookies back down, they could always release someone. It's a drastic move but it's been done in the past.

On the surface, it seems like they are firing some veteran guy but they really aren't. They are telling the league that they don't have room on their roster for him and making him available so some other team can pick him up. In the past, guys who only played one or two games a week and were released by the Red Sox were picked up by another team and they suddenly end up as a full time player who excels with that new team.

Everyone is happy all around.

*

You might find these interesting:

• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Month.



• Here's your Naked Guy In The News story.



• High school boys aren't usually the brightest bulbs on the candelabra.