It was a football kind of day.

The Patriots showed the Jaguars how to play championship football today by beating them 24-20. Those of us that follow the Patriots knew this was going to happen because, hey, it's the Patriots and it's what they do.

So now it's on to the SuperB owl in two weeks and you can assume I'll be watching.

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Someone on my Facebook feed posted one of those smarmy "7 rules to live by" or something like that. Every time I see one of those things I laugh at it because it's either a list of complete bullshit or a list of highly obvious crap.

You've seen these lists so know what I mean.

Things like "Make peace with your past" or "Love the one you're with" or my favorite, "Time heals all wounds". Tell that to the war vet with no legs. No matter how much time passes, he does not grow new legs.

They make no sense at all.

With that in mind, I decided to once again create my own "7 rules to live by" things:

1. Sore feet suck. Buy good shoes or go barefoot. But not on a plane. Noe one wants to be trapped in a sealed tube with you and your stinky feet. And yes, your feet stink. Everyones feet stink. It's what they do.


2. Rich people say money can’t buy happiness. Rich people are full of shit. There has never been a sad lottery winner.


3. Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a poisoned fish and you feed him for his lifetime. See what I did there? I changed a religious thing into a funny thing. That’s called humor. People that don’t have a sense of humor are boring. Stay away from them.


4. Yes, there is enough time to do everything you want to do. If you stop worrying about how clean your house is or if your yard is landscaped, you will have plenty of time to do what you want. Screw that clean house thing. Just make sure you don't have rotting garbage on your kitchen floor and you'll be all set. And yes, those dishes will do themselves - see rule 5.


5. Get a dog. They love you, they protect you and they don’t care if you fart. Hell, they fart all the time so they better not care. Also, they’ll clean your dishes for you after you eat.


6. Yes, it would be nice if we had a source of cheap renewable electricity but until they find one, shut up about the gas pipeline. Either that or come on over to my house. I’ll be happy to hook a bike up to my generator and you can pedal it all evening long while I watch my television.


7. No, you shouldn’t just dance or sing in public. You probably have a crappy voice and no rhythm. If you had a good voice or decent rhythm, you would be famous. So for everybody's sake, just stop it.

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While I spend my evening thinking about what I want to take for lunch tomorrow, you can enjoy these links:

• Someone deleted the music from a music video and it's funny as hell.



• People dressed in T-Rex costumes was funny the first time I saw it but the thousandth time, not so much.



• In Alabama, they take their cheesecake and fractions very seriously.