Say goodbye to 2012 and all your money..

I'm not sure who coined the phrase "fiscal cliff" but it's pretty accurate. We're all about to fall into an abyss.

*

Compared to 2011, I gotta tell you that 2012 was a pretty damned good year for us.

My eldest has passed every test they've conducted on him and we've made it through the year without any health scares. Personally, I can't ask for any more than that.

If 2013 stays the same as 2012, I will be a happy man.

I hope your 2012 was a good year and that your 2013 is even better.

*

Now, I'm going to try and stay awake until midnight. While I do that, you can visit these links if you are so inclined:

• What do you mean it's "not food"?



• When I read this, all I could think of was this.



• Only in Florida.



• If I lived in Ohio, I would vote for Rob Portman.

Nice lazy day

I managed to get the driveway and walks cleared around 10:00 this morning and then spent the rest of the day being lazy.

I like being lazy. I like it a lot.

*

My daughter contacted us last night to let us know that she is safe and sound in Costa Rica. Her cell phone doesn't work but there appears to be WiFi available in most places. She is using her iPad to text her mom.

Ain't technology wonderful.

*

Have our elected officials stopped acting like spoiled little brats and started acting like adults yet?

Nope.

Since they aren't willing to balance their budget, I guess I better start thinking about what I can cut from mine.

So much for an improving economy.

*

Here are some links you may find clickable:

• The world is filled with crazy people.



• Only in Florida.



• I don't think it "made her crazy". I think she was crazy well before then.



• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.

A snowy Saturday is way better than a nice work day.

Did they fix the economy yet?

Nope.

We're screwed.

*

On the other hand, we've always got terrorism to worry about...

*

Here are a couple of links you can click on:

• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Decade. He spent $70,000.00 to hide a $30,000.00 car. Idiot.



• Yes, alcohol was involved.

Yes, I'm still on vacation.

No, the federal government hasn't gotten it's sh!t together yet and we're all going to be dirt poor in a few days.

It's the AMT thing that most of us should worry about....

*

Damn. I always admired him. I always wished the Colin Powell and Norman Schwarzkopf had gotten together to run for President/Vice President. I would have voted for them with no hesitation.

*

My daughter is continuing her educational experience over this Christmas break by taking a mid-year field trip. Her biology professor invited her and several of her classmates on a little trip to study the rainforest of Costa Rica.

It's a tough job but someone's gotta do it.

*

Todays links are here:

• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.



• Researchers: Contributing to the betterment of our society or a complete waste of perfectly good oxygen. We report, you decide.



• Yes, alcohol was involved. By the way, the "making a noise like an elephant" is funny as hell.



• Why?



• Yea but it makes your pee smell awful.

Are you ready for your financial hit?

It's beginning to look like the democrats and the republicans are still acting like dickheads and we will pay the price when are federal tax rate suddenly increases for those of us who have painstakingly calculated our withholding.

I blame Eric Cantor for most of this mess. He's the head dickhead in this. It is my understanding that he might even be undercutting John Boehner by telling the republicans in the house to vote against any solution.

I don't like Eric Cantor at all and if my taxes suddenly go up by $2,000 or $3,000, I'm gonna really dislike him.

Him and every other member of our federal government.

*

You can visit these links if you would like:

• "Godzilla" has retired. I always liked him. He brought a lot of class and grace to the game. Oh, and he also played it very, very well.



• Christmas - it's the Hap-Hap-Happiest Time of the Year!



• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• Key phrase in this story: "...it is not the first time he has used the method..."



• I picture pants that are propelling themselves around the store by farting.

Back to work?

For those of you that had to return to work today let me just say that it sucks to be you. I took the whole week off and I won't be going back to work until January 2nd.

*

It looks like we are going to need another new senator.

John Kerry, a man who has been my senator for the last 30 years and hasn't done a damn thing that has helped me in all that time, has been tapped by President Obama to become the Secretary of State when Hillary Clinton steps down.

This is one of the few decisions that President Obama has made that I am happy with because as a senator, John Kerry kinda sucks. Anything that gets him out of my little life is a good thing.

He's a large, arrogant, ugly man who has never really had an original thought, does exactly what the senior leadership tells him to do and has little or no concern for those of us that have to work for a living.

In other words, he's the perfect Secretary of State.

*

If you haven't seen this yet, here is the "war of words" currently going on in New York over privacy rights vs. First Amendment rights.

Personally, I think it's pretty stupid and hypocritical of the newspaper to publish the names and addresses of people who are trying their best to adhere to the laws while never publishing the names and addresses of 17 year old criminals.

Having said that, I think it's just as stupid and hypocritical of the blogger to post the names and addresses of the newspaper folks who are only doing what they perceive as their job. If you read some of the comments in the blog, you will see there is mention of finding where their children go to school.

In my humble opinion, anyone who thinks it's okay to go after the children of people that they feel have insulted them is someone who needs to be put into a mental institution for evaluation and incarceration.

There is something wrong with our society and both of those links are indicative of the problems.

*

Oh, and speaking of the ongoing attempt to squash the 2nd Amendment of the Constitution, a bunch of highly-paid actors were recruited to make a anti-gun Public Service Video. Here is that video with a few extra scenes added.

*

Here are some links that you can feel free to click on:

• It's the mug shot that makes the story interesting. I particularly liked the burned hair on the right side of his head. It's an interesting look.



• Only in Florida.



• Key phrase in this story: "Five of the seven moves were because of evictions."



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Day.



• I don't want to see these things were I work. Ever.

Merry Christmas

I'll let you enjoy this picture that I took of my dog while we were waiting for the kids to wake up this morning:

CAN WE OPEN PRESENTS NOW!!!!

*

Merry Christmas Everyone. I hope you all got what you want.

Welcome to minimilistic interwebbing

It's Christmas Eve, dammit, and I'm not going to spend it writing a load of crap for you to read. I spent it eating a lot of food and laughing with some family type people.

Trust me, you should be doing the same thing.

*

Here are some links:

• Bah. Humbug.



• Merry Christmas Dude!



• YES!

It's quiet. Almost too quiet....

This is shaping up as the perfect storm. My youngest came home from college sick and he still hasn't recovered.

Today, my wife woke up feeling like dreck and she's all jammed up. According to her, she can be sick today but not tomorrow or Tuesday.

I say good luck to that.

Also, my daughter has managed to flip her sleep schedule so now she is sleeping from 3:00am to 2:00pm which is not good at this time of the year.

And on top of that, my eldest, who has poison ivy, is working in Boston until 11:00 tonight. After that, he'll hop into his car and drive home.

He should probably arrive here around 1:00 or 2:00am and hopefully fall asleep until 8:00 tomorrow morning when we will wake him up and we will all go see his doctor for his first annual followup.

As for me, I feel great and I'm sleeping like a corpse at night.

As weird as it sounds, I'm the only one that has a pretty good chance of not being sick, tired or cranky for Christmas.

WhoDaThunk.....

*

Enjoy these links:

• Key phrase in this story: "Now he can be boss of the jail."



• She's gonna get coal in her stocking.



• Pffftttt.... Nerds..... (These are my people!)



• Can you image living next door to these people....



• She's cute but I don't know that I'd call her "irresistible".

Things to do and places to be.

This posting is late and short because today was the day we started our traditional Christmas celebration.

Yes sir, this evening was spent at a traditional Christmas celebration, eating the traditional Christmas pizza, drinking traditional Christmas root beer and telling traditional dirty jokes.

What can I say, we're a traditionalist family.

*

Here are a couple of  links you might like:

• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.



• When it came to photographs, LIFE magazine was it.

Happy End Of The Mayan Calendar Day!

That's right folks, today is the day that we celebrate the end of the Mayan calendar.

On this day, a really long freakin' time ago, some guy named Larry the Mayan was working away in the local calendar shop when he got the bright idea of making a calendar that was good for a really long freakin' time. He noticed that the guy next door to him, Harold the Mayan, had a lot of roundish stones outside the back of his Invention Shop so he wandered over and got himself the biggest stone he could find. Then started carving dates onto it.

Eventually, his wife, Beatrice the Mayan, walked into the calendar shop and said, "Larry, you've been here for 18 days, carving that stupid stone. I'm sick and tired of bringing you dinner. Stop it and come home."

So Larry stopped what he was doing, took a step back, looked at his creation and said, "Yea, I guess December 21, 2012 is enough for now. I'll come back later and finish it up."

Then, when he stepped out of the door to his calendar shop, he was immediatly run over and killed by Harold's newest invention, the wheel, thus preventing him from doing any further work on his calendar.

And that, my friends, is as reasonable explanation as any as to why the Mayan calendar ends on December 21st, 2012.

*

I was crusing the interwebs and looking at statistics when I discovered the following:

• In 2009, there were 9,000+ deaths related to firearms.


• In 2009, there were 32,000+ deaths related to motor vehicles.

So before I get off on some rant about banning motor vehicles, lets just get to the links:

• Only in Florida.



• Actually, it might also explain the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and Ross Perot...



• Here's your Naked Guy not really in the News story.



• This is why Dogs are way better than cats.

Armed teachers?

I'm not sure if this is the best approach to solving the problem but it is a far better idea than the "Let's ban guns! That'll fix the problem!" approach that seems to be the focus of our government.

And just so you know, I'm not against the concept of banning future sales of high capacity firearms but I don't understand what that will accomplish, other than making Diane Feinstein and Nancy Pelosi feel good about themselves.

Between 2000 and 2010, the Bushmaster corporation sold close to half a million AR-15 rifles. I have no idea how many AR-15 rifles the Armalite Corporation or Colt Firearms sold but I can imagine it's probably about the same. My conservative estimate is that there are more than one million AR-15 rifles in the hands of American citizens.

The genie is out of the bottle folks and no matter what the government tries to do, it won't ever be able to put it back. If the government ever tries something stupid like attempting to force people to turn in their guns, it'll be a fiasco. People won't do it. As a matter of fact, you might just see a bunch of armed standoffs between the federal government and those crazy militias out west. Those guys are the "You can have my gun when you pry it from my cold dead hands" kind of guys.

Oh, and by the way, the AR-15 is just one of a class of high-end, high-capacity semi-automatic rifles known as carbines. I can't begin to imagine how many M1, M1A, Mini-14, REC-7, SR25 or SCAR-17 carbines are floating around out there.

*

Todays links are listed below:

• Parenting 101 - Don't act like your kids.



• Only in Pennsylvania.



• Only in Florida.



• Sounds like they belong with each other.

Not quite done yet.

I have a few more things to get and then I will be done. And by done, I mean that I will not set foot into another store for at least a month.

I hate shopping but all that aside, what I really don't like is being around the angry, stressed-out, overworked, underpaid people that are wandering around the malls like crazed meth addicts, screaming at each other, trying to buy presents.

No wonder there are fistfights and shootings in malls. Those people are nuts...

*

Here are this evenings links that you can click on if you would like:

• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.



• Turns out that the story isn't quite as interesting as the headline made it out to be.



• It's the hap-hap-happiest time of the year.



• Researchers: Contributing to the betterment of society or a complete waste of perfectly good oxygen. We report, you decide.

Another hero leaves us.

Daniel Inouye was a genuine hero and a hell of a good man. We need more people like him, not less.

*

So now that I have a start on my Christmas shopping, I feel that I can relax a little. I have five days left to finish it up which means I am ahead of the game. And I have proof that I am ahead of the game - I found a receipt in my coat pocket from last year with a date of December 23, 2011 on it.

That means that I am three or four days ahead of schedule.

Just call me Mr. Efficient.

*

You can visit these if you would like:

• Fair warning - You probably shouldn't watch this.



• Ouch!



• Apparently the Swedes are just as crazy as everyone else.



• Well, maybe not quite as crazy as the Chinese.



• It might be time to think about deleting my Facebook account.

And thus begins my last week of work for the year.

This is a full week of work for me and it's one of those weeks where everyone will want something done by me. I will try my best to accomodate them but I make no promises since I'll be off from work next week, enjoying Christmas with my family.

And by enjoying Christmas, I mean sleeping late, eating everything that is put in front of me and driving my wife crazy by watching at least 10 hours of the 24 hour marathon of "A Christmas Story" on TBS.

Like I said, it's good to have goals.

*

Another thing that will be taking place this week is my attempt to complete my Christmas shopping before Christmas. That means I don't have a lot of time to type this drivel.

*

Here are todays links:

• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.



• Key phrase in this story about Rednecks: "We didn't need any jumper cables today."



• Key phrase in this story: "Yes, with a pony!"

I still haven't done any Christmas shopping.

I'm working this week but I'm hoping that I can get all of my Christmas shopping done in the evenings before, well, you know, Christmas.

It's nice to have goals....

*

Not much that I want to prattle on about so how about we just get to some links:

• What the hell is wrong with our society...



• Key phrase in this followup story: "...he wouldn't leave them alone..."



• Only in Florida.



• If you're gonna do something illegal, you probably shouldn't plaster yourself with identifying marks.

Moving right along....

I'm going to stay away from any comment on what happened yesterday. I spoke my peace yesterday and I'll leave it at that.

I will, however, note that while I think the sentiment expressed in the "Morgan Freemen" quote is fairly succinct and accurate, I doubt that it came from Mr. Freeman. Despite my searching high and low, I am unable to locate a source for the quote.

It looks like the quote first appeared on Facebook yet it is nowhere to be found on Mr. Freemans Facebook page. That tells me that like most of the internet, it's complete bullsh!t.

*

I spent an hour this afternoon out in Boston with my eldest offspring.

His car, my old car, the Deer Hunter, is beginning to experience it's age and there is something wrong with it. Since he is planning on leaving work at midnight on the 23rd and driving home, I didn't want him to take a chance that he might break down at 1:00am on the MassPike. I decided to go out with another car and swap with him.

We had some lunch at a barbecue joint he discovered a couple of months ago and it does me proud to find that my son is able to locate excellent barbecue. It was one of the best brisket sandwiches I've had in a long time.

Anyways, we chatted about guy crap while we ate and then I headed for home. I made it home with no issues and this Monday, I'll take the car over to the boys at Wilbraham Tire. They'll figure out what's wrong with it and that is when he gets to make a decision about what he wants to do - invest money into a car that is approaching 14 years old and has 100,000 miles on it or buy another car.

*

You can visit these links if you want:

• Only in Florida.



• Also only in Florida.



• Apparently the Canadian government is just as screwed up as ours.



• Why the hell would anyone watch this crap.



• It's only a matter of time before our government bans gravity.



• Hey, he warned her....

There is nothing I can possibly say.

As I was driving home with my youngest, listening to the radio, he said, "What is wrong with us?"

I told him I have no idea but something is obviously not right with our society.

First some guy goes into a movie theater and kills 12 people, then some guy goes into a mall and kills 2 people and now some guy goes into a room filled with little kids and kills at least 20 of them.

You can't blame it on guns because there have been guns in our society since it was founded.

No, it's not the guns. It's the people.

So I guess my question is what is different about the people.

Is it the stress of the massive unemployment?

Is it the permissiveness of our society in the sense that suddenly everything is okay?

Is it a chemical imbalance do to the overuse of some drug?

Is it because of all the radio signals floating around, effecting our brains?

I have no idea what it is but I do know that when some mental deficient can walk into a room filled with babies and kill them, there is something wrong and we better figure out what it is.

Soon.

Short Day = Kinda Short Post.

My team left work at two this afternoon and went bowling. We had a good time and I did good but my right arm is currently not functional.

I hate to say it but I'm old and broken down.

*

Did they solve the financial crisis yet?

Nope, not yet.

*

Here's an amusing picture to help fill up this post with crap:

*

You may, or may not, enjoy these links:

• Presenting the winner of the "Father of the Year" award.



• Key entry from our favorite police blotter: "5:44 p.m. A woman in a gold car was seen yelling at customers as she drove around the parking lot of an Evergreen gas station numerous times."



• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.

As I mentioned previously....

....this week (and some of next) will consist of several "Long Day = Short Post".

This is one such day.

*

Try these links if you would like:

• We are all screwed.



• The groom might be a complete idiot but you gotta wonder what the bride is like....



• Wait for it... Wait for it...

Time to make a hole in my wall.

I have this phobia about poking holes through plywood. When I poke a hole in drywall, I know that if I screw it up, I can patch it and it will look like I was never there. It is truly amazing what can be done with a can of spackle.

Plywood, however, is a different story. The only way to patch plywood and make it look seamless is to either replace the entire sheet or find a nice way to cover the seam with some type of molding.

The power inlet will consist of a circle cut through the porch wall into the garage. The porch wall is made of 3/4 inch "A/C" exterior grade plywood that has been painted. If I screw up the cut, I'll have to puy a sheet of 3/4 inch "AC" plywood which runs around $40.00.

I don't want to pay $40.00 for a screw up so I'm hoping my phobia will make me be extra careful and I'll do it right the first time.

*

Still no change in the budget situation. It looks like the administration and congress are working together to make me pay more taxes that will be used to pay for things I'm not really all that interested in.

Pardon me while I gaze fondly at my 401(k) balance, knowing that it will probably be crushed like a grape under the heal of a stock market crash while at the same time the amount of oney the government rips from my hands will increase drastically.

I wonder when they'll reopen the debtors prisons....

*

Todays links:

• Oops.



• Why is it that I have a sneaking suspicion that the term "customer credit" is a code speak for "raise our rates to cover the fine"....



• Trust me on this - watch the video. The mug shot is worth it's weight in gold.



• Only in Florida.

It has finally arrived.

I am now the proud owner of a NEMA L14-30 all-weather power inlet. That means that this weekend, I can install it on my porch, run a complete system test and give myself my seal of approval.

At some point in the near future, my cousin will give his seal of approval.

Then it will be up to the town to give the official seal of approval.

At least I hope they give the official seal of approval....

*

I'm fast approaching the time when I will be doing very little work and much vacationing. That means that this period of time is filled with long days as I attempt to finish up all of the outstanding tasks before I walk out the door on a 14 day absence.

What I'm trying to say is that this is kind of a long day and you get kind of a short post.

*

Here are some links:

• Key phrase in this story: "We don't do men in tights..."



• Key phrase in this story: "I shouldn’t say it was funny but it was kind of comical."



• Beer: Is there anything it can't do...

Another successful Christmas party

We spent a few hours with our neighbors yesterday evening at our annual Christmas party. This party is a collaboration between two neighbors. One supplies the house, the other supplies the bacon-wrapped scallops. The rest of us supply appetizers/snacks/desserts/booze.

What started out as a small neighborhood gathering five or six years ago has grown to include folks from all over town, including a gaggle of retired (or about to retire) teachers from Minnechaug. The enjoyable part is that these teachers were my teachers when I was in high school back during the precambian period....

Anyways, it was fun chatting with everyone last night. This little tradition has become the official start of the Christmas season for me.

That means that now I have to put up the Christmas decorations and start getting all Christmaseeee and stuff.

Ho Ho Ho.

*

Does anyone know if the two biggest a$$holes in the country have come to any agreement on the budget?

No?

It's gonna be a crappy New Year for a lot of us.

*

Here are some links you might like:

• Nice guy....



• Yea, but was there any barbeque sauce?



• Some people are just plain stupid.



• How did I miss this local story of the Brilliant Criminal of the Week?



• Apparently, we're doing it wrong....



• Yet another story of the TSA in action.

I hate those Rosetta Stone commercials

The  little pretentious bitch who says, "I love it when I dream in french" in french needs to be slapped and the redneck who pontificates that, "By far, Rosetta Stone is the best product out there" needs to go back to the fifth grade and learn english before he learns japanese or whatever language it is that he's a fixin' to learn'.

Every time I see that commercial, I'm reminded of the very first skit ever shown on Saturday Night Live.

*

I spent this evening at a neighborhood Christmas party. That means this is a short post with no links.

Catch you all tomorrow.

71 years is a long time.

Today marks the 71st anniversary of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor.

It was a generally crappy day for a lot of kids who all probably thought they had the best life in the world, living on an island paradise in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Unfortunately for 2,300+ of those kids, that paradise quickly became hell and their lives ended right around 8:00am on a Sunday morning.

*

For those of concerned about my unlicensed electrical abilities, rest assured that my cousin, the master electrician, has agreed to inspect my work. This should hopefully relieve any fears that may be wandering around in certain peoples heads....

*

Here are a few links you can click on:

• If I read this correctly, this guy is a moron who screws up more than a two year old.



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Month.



• Mine would probably eat it.

My power inlet has shipped.

Pretty soon, my house will be prepared to handle whatever power outages mother nature decides to throw my way.

No more extension cords and no more open basement windows. Just pure electricity coursing through the wires in the walls, powering my refrigerator, my furnace, my lights and, most importantly, my TV set.

*

According to the website CreditCards.com, if Obama and Boehner don't stop shoving each other like 3rd graders in a playground fight, I am royally screwed, blued and tattooed.

I won't be getting $500 or a $1,000 back in the tax refund I calculated out when I changed my witholding last January. Instead, I will be looking around for a non-existent $6,000 or $7,000 to send to the government so that the large men in black suits don't show up at my door and take me away in ankle irons.

I'm too old and frail to go to jail.

*

If you're interested, you can click on these links:

• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.



• Key phrase in this story that involves Massachusetts, the most corrupt state in the union: "I'm curious to know where the rest of the money is spent."



• This one has everything - This involved a drunk redneck at a Walmart in Florida.



• This is your brain. This is your brain on drugs.

Long Day = Short Post

Enjoy these few links:

• Key phrase in this story: "...hunting for a thinner cell-mate who managed to escape first."



• Some say 'scorned', I say 'freaking psycho'.



• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• Only in Florida.

Back at work

As much as I enjoyed taking yesterday off, I felt the need to go back to work today.

And based on that previous sentence, I'm wondering if I might need to go see a shrink...

*

I'm getting sick and tired of hearing about the "fiscal cliff". It's a phrase that is designed to frighten us.

The government wants to frighten us just enough so that when they suddenly announce that they've reached a compromise, we'll all be damned glad that we only have to pay a few hundred dollars more every year in taxes instead of the few thousand we would have to pay if they didn't reach a compromise.

We are a stupid, gullible people and when all of this is over in January, we'll be all excited about the fact it cost us money.

*

You can click on the following links:

• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Month.



• Key phrase in this story: "...a celebrity wedding slated for February."



• When you gotta go, you gotta go.

Days off are nice.

Not only did I get to relax a little today, I managed to finish transferring all eight circuits over to my fancy-shmancy subpanel.

I enjoyed doing this little project and now that it's close to being done, I hope I never have to use it.

*

You can visit these links if you are so inclined:

• Key phrase in this story: "They complied."



• I thought it was bad on the MassPike....



• Here's your Naked Guy.... Oh, wait. Never mind.



• Only in Pennsylvania.

We have a transfer of power.

I decided to move two circuits over - the refrigerator and the furnace are now powered off the subpanel. That way, if the power goes out, I'll be able to....

....do what I've always had to do.

Until my power inlet arrives, I'll have to wire one extension cord into my furnace and drag another extension cord over to my refrigerator.

So I guess moving circuits from the main to the sub really doesn't do me much good for now. It just gets things ready to go when the inlet finally arrives and I install it.

And when that happens, well let me tell you, I will be a happy guy.

*

Here are the few Sunday links I was able to dig up:

• You can interpret this headline in more than one way...



• WUSA just became my favorite television station.



• I'm pretty sure that the third picture is just plain wrong on many, many levels.



• When I was a kid, this was known as good parenting.

December is here.

How the hell did it become December so freakin' quickly.

I've got to get some Christmas shopping done and the government needs to get the budget taken care of.

And too be honest with you, I'm pretty sure it's more important that I get my Christmas shopping done than it is for the government to figure out the budget.

The way I figure it, no matter what happens with this whole "fiscal cliff" thing, I'm going to get screwed and it's going to cost me money.

If there is one thing I've learned after all these years, it's that anytime the government does anything with taxes, it ends up costing me money.

*

It Is Alive!!!

The subpanel has electricity running to it and it is ready to accept the first two 15amp circuits. The circuit extension wires are run but not connected to the actual circuits. I figure on Monday, when I'm home alone, I'll kill the circuits and swing them over.

After that, it'll be a simple matter of pulling the wires for the remaining six circuits and swinging them over.

This is all assuming that I don't electrocute myself or burn down my house....

*

Here are todays links:

• Chris sends us this "Why we love dogs" story which has the key phrase: "...they are also looking into a GPS tracker for Peyton."



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant yet Honest Criminal of the Week.



• I'm pretty certain I'd do the same thing.

No, we did not win the Powerball.

Not only did we not win the Powerball, we didn't even win a dollar.

Once again, my retirement plans are crushed under the heel of Lady Lucks pointy little shoes.

She's a bitch....

*

I finally got around to ordering my power inlet for my generator hookup. When that arrives, I will have to manufacture a faceplate for it.

Basically, I ordered a circular power inlet with a flip-up weather tight cover. This device needs to be mounted on a face plate which in turn needs to then be screwed onto the work box.

I'm thinking of buying a sheet of brass and cutting it to the size I need. Then I'll cut the proper sized circular hole in it and mount the inlet in that opening.

Sometimes I make more of things than I need to but since this is going to be on my porch, which is basically another room of my house, I want it to be unobtrusive and attractive.

*

You can visit these links if you would like:

• In case you are one of the 3 or 4 people living under a rock who have not seen this yet, here is another winner of the Nice Guy of the Year award.



• It's gonna be a 'guy funeral'....



• Yes, alcohol was involved. (Yes, it was in Pennsylvania)



• The Beeracuda.

I spent the day in a class today

That means today is a Long Day = Short Post kind of day.

*

Here are a few links:

• Key phrase in this story: "They did, however, notice a bottle of liquor and a glass in the kitchen."



• The Supreme Court is kinda old.



• It's just a matter of time before they outlaw ukuleles....

Yes, I'm in a Powerball pool.

I'm in a pool with 10 other folks. I doubt we will win anything because we never do but we figured kicking in $4.00 apiece for a shot at $500 million wasn't a bad idea.

Hey, the way I look at it, if we win anything more than $44.00, we are ahead of the game. If we don't win anything, we've had a good time over the last few days talking about how we would spend the money.

*

Todays links can be found below:

• Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Mr. Joe Lueken, winner of the Nice Guy of the Year award.



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Day.



• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.



• Best comment: "LIIIIIIIIIIKE A GLOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE"

44 years is a long time.

A friend of mine is retiring after being with our company for 44 years. If you're like me and you have a certain skill with programming, you would know that he's been with the company for 16,227 days.

That's a lot of days....

*

Here are a few links for you to visit:

• The terrorists have won.



• The terrorists have won.



• The terrorists have won.



• The terrorists have won and we should be prepared.

This work thing keeps getting in the way of my relaxation thing.

I left work last Tuesday at noon with the plan of not doing any work at all. I was going to relax and enjoy the Thanksgiving holiday as best I could.

Looking back over the last five days, I'm proud to say that I accomplished that goal.

Now, however, I am back at work and feeling like maybe I should have at least logged in and checked my email.

After deleting all of the email that was a sales pitch or spam, I was left with 154 emails to go through. Most of them require a response and some of them require research or work on my part.

It's gonna be a busy week....

*

I finally got around to color-coding the wires in the new subpanel so it's clear which ones are hot, which ones are ground and which ones are neutral. It might not seem important but trust me, it is.

In a few years, when I've completely forgotten how I installed everything, the color coding lets me know which wires I should avoid touching when the power is on. It also lets everyone else know which ones are capable of killing them.

Knowing things like that is always a good.

*

You might want to visit these links:

• Researchers: Contributing to the betterment of our society or a complete waste of perfectly good oxygen. We report, you decide.



• Key phrase in this story: "Yeah, I can think of probably better things I can buy out of a vending machine than fish eggs."



• Instead of suing the police department, maybe she should take a long hard look at herself and her son. Maybe she needs to admit that her son is an asshole and she's probably the cause of his assholeishness...



• This is nice and all but if I recall correctly, President Bush flew over to Baghdad and served Thanksgiving dinner to hundreds of troopers.



• How do you lose a device that is designed to be tracked?

Christmas Shopping is a pain in the neck

Even doing it online is a pain in the neck.

A few years ago, there were more places to buy things online but there were fewer choices of products to buy. Now there are fewer places to buy things but there are far more choices of products.

For instance, back in 2001, if you wanted to buy, oh, I don't know, maybe a Nintendo GameCube, you could check prices at Circuit City, Best Buy, CompUSA, Toys backwardR Us, etc... for a Game Cube with two controllers.

Now, if you want to buy a Nintendo GameCube, you can check Best Buy, Walmart, Target, etc... but you have about a dozen "bundle" choices to make, all of them different prices. There's the GameCube with one controller and four games option, the GameCube with two controllers and the mindreading device but no games option and then there's the GameCube with the naked college coed but no controllers option.

How the hell do I know which "bundle" to get? I don't play the damned game. I have no idea which is "funner" or "cooler". I'm old and out of touch. Give me one choice and a decent price and I'm okay with that.

Like I said, it's a pain in the neck.

*

My eldest returned to his Boston life yesterday, my daughter returned to her Vermont life this afternoon and my youngest returned to his New Hampshire life this afternoon.

Once again, my house is quiet and it's just my wife, myself and The Dog. We still have the cats but I don't count them because they spend their entire day sleeping on the bed so I never see them.

*

No, I didn't spend any time working on my electrical panel today. I did, however, go find some links:

• Well, I guess that's one way to get revenge on your old employer.
  



• Only in Florida.



• Because, hey, you can never be too careful.



• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.

And the work continues.

It dawned on me that I'm really moving slowly on this subpanel.

Well, there is a reason for that - I don't want to electrocute myself or burn down my house.

Two good reasons to move slow, if you ask me.

*

Here are some links you can click on:

• Not sure about you folks, but this caused The Dog to go a little nuts and made me go out to check on my neighborhood.



• In case you were wondering, the Japanese are still crazy.



• Not only is this Only in Florida, it's also a Only in WalMart.



• And Lo' the Christmas Season doth begineth. (It's also at WalMart).

I have found the next great invention.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm pleased to present the See-Thru Propane Tank.

That is, in my humble summer-time-cook-out-yard-filled-with-people-waiting-for-food opinion, one of the greatest inventions of all time. It ranks right up there with toilet paper and the wheel.

If you've ever run out of propane in the middle of grilling up several steaks, you'll understand why I feel that way.

*

I finally started pulling wire into my new subpanel. This is the run from the generator to the panel.

I have one piece of conduit installed that will hold the feed from the main panel. I need to install a second piece for the eight individual circuit extensions.

I'm planning on putting new breakers in the subpanel and leaving the existing breakers in the main. I'll tape the ones in the main over and label them as unused. That way, if I ever decided to remove the subpanel, I can just swing the circuits back over to the main.

When all is said and done, there will be no more extension cords running through my house when the power goes out.

*

So here are some links you can visit if you want:

• There's a reason why hunters use guns.



• Key phrase in this story: "He then administered an injection in the woman's buttocks to alleviate the toothache and then kissed her buttocks."



• Not only is he an idiot, he's a lying sack of crap.



• Only in China.



• Oops.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Go eat some turkey and enjoy your day because that's what I'm gonna do.

Days off are great.

I took today off because, well, why not. I have a lot of vacation time left and if I don't take it, I lose it.

Trust me, I'm not gonna lose any vacation time.

Ever again.

*

Links:

• This one is for my daughter.



• Key phrase in this story: "It’s sort of embarrassing."



• Dads - We do the most interesting things to entertain our kids.



• Tom sends us this catchy little tune via his Facebook page.

The Dog is very happy.

Two of our offspring arrived home today (one of them is actually still here, the other is off "hanging with his buds") and the third will be arriving later tonight. This makes The Dog extremely happy.

It also makes my wife and I happy but since we don't have a giant tail that we can wag back and forth, smacking against tables and people and such, it doesn't show as much.

*

Oh, and I would like to say one thing to the asshole from Rhode Island with the bad case of road rage and a giant SUV that tried to kill my daughter on 91:

Heads up punk, if I ever find you, I will ruin you.

*

Here are todays links:

• I would like to point out to all you activists out there that messing with heavily-armed guys is probably not a bright idea. It's akin to poking a stick into a hornets nest - eventually you're gonna get stung.



• Here's more proof that our species is kinda retarded.



• Key phrase in this story: "The clown is a well-known local activist who is often spotted protesting outside government buildings."



• The word "psycho" comes to mind....



• You gotta love Conan O'Brien and his writers.

Mondays can be a real drag.

This Monday, however, isn't so bad. I'm taking a half day off tomorrow to go retrieve my youngest from school and then I'm taking the rest of the week off. That means today was my only full day of work.

It doesn't suck to be me.

*

Do you know how much a new gasket for a dishwasher costs?

I do - $35.00 for a what amounts to a 6 foot length of rubber tubing, that's how much they cost.

Personally, I'm pretty sure that's a lot of money for a piece of tubing.

*

I have made no progress on my new generator subpanel simply because I havn't been able to verify some things. I'm trying to get in touch with the electrical inspector before I move forward because I need to know if I really need to have a master electrician install this thing or if I can pull the permit and do it myself.

I know the electrical codes and I have the ability to do a safe and neat job but I'm not doing anything if the town might suddenly come along one day and accuse me of a capital crime for not following the letter of the law.

I don't want to be executed by the state for not filling out the proper form.

*

Here are some links:

• Massachusetts: We're more corrupt than Illinois!



• In case you don't know what the previous article was referring to, here's the deal.



• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• I see very little difference between her political party and either the Democrats or the Republicans.

Has Israel invaded Gaza yet?

At some point, the Israelis are going to invade Gaza and make it a hamas-free zone. They will kill everyone remotely related to either Hamas or the Muslim Brotherhood and, in my opinion, they might be justified.

Last year, there was a little thing called "The Arab Spring" that resulted in the middle-east becoming extremely tribal. All the little tribes are now following the lead of one fanatic or another and they are all at war with each other. The Shi'ites are killing the Sunnis, the Sunnis are killing the Sufis and everyone hates the poor Kurds.

Enter the Palestinians who start saying, "Hey! You guys need to stop killing each other and let's get to killing the Jews!" So now Hamas, which is an offshoot of the Muslim Brotherhood and closely related to the current leadership of Egypt, Libya, Yemen and Tunisia is asking for help in eliminating Israel from the face of the earth.

Now Hamas has the backing of Egypt and Libya and they have started launching random rockets into Israel. Israel, in turn, started launching not-so-random air attacks on Gaza.

In the past, when this kind of thing happened, the President of the United States would step in and get the two parties together at someplace like Camp David and make them agree to stop killing each other.

Our current President does not appear to be doing that and as a result, this is probably going to end badly.

*

This made me giggle...

*

You can click on these links of you would like to:

• The way I look at it, you can either pay $3,000.00 for a taste or you can learn how to make your own and taste them for the rest of your life.



• Here's your Naked Guy in the News story.



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "1:00 p.m. There was talk of criminal mischief at a bar on Highway 35 in Kalispell."

MS update should be smarter than it is.

On Tuesday, Microsoft released 18 updates/patches to their products. Since I have my laptop configured to check for updates but ask me if I want them, I received the notice on Tuesday evening that there were updates ready for computer.

I looked at the updates and they all seemed like something I wanted except for two of them. One was an update to Sharepoint and the other was an update to OneNote, two products I have installed but have never used.

After some thought I decided I would allow all updates.

After about three hours of listening to my hard drive spin and my fan run constantly, I decided to find out what was going on with the damned updates. Turns out it was stalled at the 17th update. This update was listed as "Update for Microsoft OneNote 2010 (KB2687277) 32-Bit Edition".

I tried to cancel the update but the process had other ideas and that wasn't happening.

Despite being warned not to turn off my computer, I decided to turn off my computer.

After it rebooted, the machine came back up and within two minutes reported that there were updates ready for my computer.

I checked to see what the updates were and sure enough, one was for SharePoint and the other was for OneNote. I selected the one for SharePoint and it installed no problem. I rebooted my computer as instructed and as soon as it came back up, I was informed there were updates ready for my computer.

I elected the update for OneNote, again, and again, it failed to install.

This was, to say the least, getting a little frustrating.

Once again, I had to hard boot my laptop and it was then that I decided maybe the problem was that I had never activated OneNote.

I started the OneNote product and, like all Microsoft products, it informed me that I had better read the 5 billion page license agreement or I would rot in a Nicaraguan jail cell for the rest of my miserable life being read the US tax code by a herd of newly-minted lawyers

After I said I agree (even though I really have no idea what I agreed to), it activated the product, did some things with an imaginary printer and created an icon in my running tasks bar,

I closed the product and then ran the update.

Lo and Behold, the update started up and my PC immediately informed me there was a program trying its best to show me a message and would I like to see the message. I said yes, I would like to see the message and a message appeared on my screen saying that One Note was trying to create a printer with the same name as an existing printer. I was given the option of clicking a button, which I did, and the update finished installing.

The bottom line here folks is if you are having trouble installing the "Update for Microsoft OneNote 2010 (KB2687277) 32-Bit Edition", it's because you never activated One Note. Activate it, install the update and move on with your life.

*

Here are some links you can visit:

• This is your brain. This is your brain on drugs.



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Week.



• What? Are they saying this is against the law?



• Only in California.



• Key phrase from our favorite police log: "7:25 a.m. Reportedly, someone on Facebook is attempting to sell dead cats."

I'm tired.

I'm not feeling great and I'm tired. I think it's a combination of the damned time change two weeks ago and some semblence of a stomach virus. It's not like I'm dying but I certainly don't feel like doing much of anything and the little that I do feel like doing, I don't feel like doing it very far away from a bathroom.

Either that or I'm just getting old.

*

This story deserves more than a one-line blurb because there are so many things leading up to this sad turn of events.

Let's start with all of the nanny governments out there who think that we should eat the food they say we should eat. "No Twinkies or large sodas for you, only rice cakes and water. But not the water in a plastic bottle. Only the water from the tap that the government supplies to you."

Moving on, we can also toss a big old heapin' of blame on the current economic state of our country.

I know, I know - It's all Bush's fault.

No, it's not Bush's fault. It's Reagan's fault, it's Bush's fault, it's Clinton's fault, it's Bush's fault and it's most certainly Obama's fault. Not a single one of those so called "leaders of the free world" ever took a look at the long-term ramifications of their supposed economic decisions.

If you haven't been paying attention, Obamas health Care bill includes a requirement that any company with more than 50 full-time employees must provide health care. This is a massive expense that most small businesses can't afford.

The simple solution is to cut everyones hours to less than 30 hours per week and hire 20 new part-timers. That way the business no longer has any full-time employees and they no longer have to offer health care.

Another simple solution is to provide the health care and raise the price of the products it produces. Something tells me that raising prices while in the middle of a recession/depression/dark ages is probably the stupidest thing imaginable and will result in a lot of companies going out of business.

Finally, let us not forget the idiots that are "leading" the unions. Every one of them takes the position that management is lying to them when they say, "We can't afford to remain in business at these wages" and they play chicken with them.

Playing chicken assumes that both vehicles have the ability to swerve. In the case of a corporation that has already declared bankruptcy twice, the steering mechanism was gone. It was like the union was in a car playing chicken with a train. And the union assumed the train would swerve.

Good job there Union representatives. It's going to be a wonderful Christmas for 18,500 families....

*

You can click on these. Or not. Whatever you feel like doing is fine with me:

• Here we go again....



• Only in Pennsylvania.



• You gotta love New Yorkers.



• Key phrase in this story: "Instead the woman produced her gun."

Five Hundred Plus visitors.

My little treatise the other day about the scam being run by "Lawyer Skadden" and the reprinting of his (or her) email seems to have drawn some attention. Normally, the counter on this blog page reads 50 visitors a week. Yesterday it read 440 and as of this moment, it reads 545.

This is because of Skadden and his (or her) paypal scam, not because I've suddenly become popular.

If I thought for one moment that the number of "hits" I get is symbolic of anything at all, I would be savoring this moment. Fortunately for me, I don't write this thing to be popular, I write it because I occasionally have some crap I want to spew and this is a good place to spew it.

If someone wants to read my spewage, good for them.

*

You can click on these links:

• Key line in the video: "GET AWAY FROM MY CAR! GET AWAY FROM MY CAR!"



• Key reader comment in this story: "Is stupidity a mental health issue?"



• They really know how to whoop it up in Tacoma, WA.



• Perhaps it was a Killer Rabbit....



• Only three more days.



• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• Doesn't everyone want less prison time? I don't know about you but I've never heard a convict say, "Wow, that sentence is perfect!" or "Pardon me Yer Honor but don't ya think ya kinda short-changed me on that sentence there?"

Let the wiring begin.

Pat says he's anxiously awaiting the completion of my project to wire my generator into my home's electrical system. He figures that once I finish it, we'll never have another power outage again.

Pat is a funny guy.

*

Links are here:

• Who the hell keeps a loaded flare gun in their apartment?



• Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Saadat Khan, the newest member of the A-Team.



• Only in Florida.

I get the best spam.

I received the following email from "Lawyer Skadden" (Yes, that is the actual name in the FROM line):

From: "Lawyer Skadden"
Subject: Summons PayPal Bill Me Later Outstanding Debt 9889

We notifies You several times about your debt to PayPal Bill Me Later.

In the event that you fail to voluntary satisfy our requirements for payment of your debt to Bill Me Later, we well have to turn to the court with the purpose of enforced collection of a debt, witch may entail additional expenses for you, for example, the expenses in the amount of state duty, the cost of representative's services for the compearance, the compensatory interest for the use or detention of money for each day of delay, and the execution free.

Furthermore, in accordance with applicable law, you may be restricted from traveling outside the territory of the country, and your property may be seized.

Based on the foregoing we offer you to pay the debt in the amount of 308.00

It appears our Nigerian friends are trying some new tricks. Also, that has got to be one the longest run-on sentences ever written.

And no, I did not open the email. I copied it onto my hard drive and made it a text file. Then I opened it with notepad. I ain't gettin' no scammer virus from "Scammer Skadden".

*

Here are todays links:

• David, David, David.... Despite what you may think, you are not invincible so please do not stand in front of trucks being driven by drunks with bad hair cuts.



• Yes, alcohol was involved. Also, pizza.



• All I can say is, "Yuck".



• Somehow or another, I'm betting Ozzie was involved.

Days off are always nice

I took today off because I originally planned on driving my youngest back to school after his three day weekend. My youngest, however, decided to go meet his girlfriends parents and then hang out with all his friends this weekend.

Personally, I don't blame him. When I was 18 years old, I would much rather be with my friends than home with mom and dad.

*

So anyways, I kept the day off and used it to finish pulling the wire that will allow me to hook my generator directly into my house wiring.

Several days ago, I ordered a subpanel with a generator interlock. This will allow me to shift 6 or 7 circuits off my main onto the subpanel so I can power them off my generator simply by shutting off one breaker and turning on another.

Trust me when I say this will be much simpler than hauling extension cords through my house.

Extension cords are a pain in the butt.

*

Here are todays links:

• I remember these idiots after the tornado and the snowstorm. They clog up the already screwed up roads and take pictures of everything like it's some kind of tv show.



• Hey, you gotta give him credit for being a multi-tasker.



• Yea, because that's what a "federal agent" looks like...



• Our favorite police log: "3:29 p.m. Someone Saran wrapped a kid to a telephone pole on East Idaho Street. A police officer helped free him."



• Researchers: Contributing to the betterment of our society or a complete waste of perfectly good oxygen. We report, you decide.

Yet another life tip for you.

I have four or five email addresses for various things. One of those email addresses is a gmail address that I use for spammy kinda things. For instance, if I am on a website that wants me to create an account to view their content, I use my gmail address to create the account because I know it's going to get a ton of spam.

The other day, I noticed a series of emails that seemed sorta legitimate but from an unknown sender. I decided to open one and found that it was from an engineering firm in London where I had apparently interviewed for a job. They wanted me to come in for a second interview with a vice president.

At first I thought it was spam but then I realized that it wasn't spam. It was a mistake.

Right now, there is some guy in London who went for a job interview and when he filled out the forms, he gave them the wrong email address. He probably would have gotten the job if he went in for the second interview but he never knew about the second interview.

Here is a life tip for you: When you interview for a job, make sure that all of your information is correct. Make sure you put down the right phone number and for cripes sake, make sure you put down the correct email address.

*

Feel free to click on these links:

• And this, my friends, is why I never eat tongue. Well, that and the fact that it's tongue....



• So it begins....



• Oh crap. This won't be good. It won't be good at all....

Fewer leaves this year

Since we had all those trees removed last year, we had far fewer leaves to deal with this year. We still had leaves but those came from my neighbors yard. They seem to have an aversion to clearing their lawn and to be honest with you, it's kinda pissing the rest of us off.

*

So now that the election is over, President Obama and Speaker Boehner have restarted their public "My Dick Is Bigger Than Your Dick" battle and we are all going to end up getting screwed.

Obama wants to keep the tax cuts enacted by George Bush but only for those folks making less than $250,000.00 a year. Boehner wants to keep the tax cuts for everybody and neither one is publicly willing to compromise.

That means we are going to have to wait until the last minute, watching those two idiots joust with each other, to learn if we are all going to pay a shitload more taxes next year or not.

*

I think someone isn't taking the results of the election very well....

*

Here are some links for you to click on:

• Key ironic phrase in this story: "That's so wrong. I would never do anybody like that. Get a job."



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "6:38 p.m. An intoxicated woman called from Highway 35 in Kalispell to report that someone she knows has been gone doing laundry for four hours."



• I know people that would pay good money to see that.