I coached soccer

Years ago, I had the privilege of coaching various soccer teams over a period of about 6 years. The age groups ranged from 6 years to 14 years old.

Trust me when I say that when you take 15 little kids and put them together, they get kinda crazy.

During all those years, I can say without any hesitation that I never once said to myself, "Hey! Here's a good idea! Let's take these 15 hyperactive nutcases with little or no self-control and walk them into a deep cave during the rainy season!"

What was that guy thinking....

⧫

The Yankees lost game one of their double header against the Orioles. This means they are now two and a half games behind the Red Sox.

If the Orioles can keep this "winning streak" alive and take game two of the double-header, that will be a good thing.

If the Red Sox win tonight, that will be a great thing.

⧫

I'm going to watch some baseball and fall asleep.

While I do that, you can do these:

• This is another reason why we need the death penalty.



• Trust me, don't do it. Ever heard how much noise these things make?



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "10:27 p.m. A stray dog was reportedly 'friendly and excited'."



• If any of you do something like this to me, I'm coming back to haunt you. And not in a good way.