Remember, us Massachusetts folk are too stupid to know how to use fireworks. The intelligent and smart people of New Hampshire and Connecticut are the only ones smart enough to use fireworks so don't go lighting any sparklers or anything.
For that matter, if you live in Massachusetts, you should just stay away from matches all together because you obviously don't know how to handle fire.
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The Red Sox have been playing well lately (they completed the sweep of the Nationals today) and they are currently in first place by a game and a half. If the Yankees win (they are currently up 5-1 over the Braves), the Red Sox will maintain a one game lead. If the Yankees lose, the Red Sox will take a two game lead.
Hopefully they lose.
It would be nice for the Red Sox to have a multi game lead in the ALEast.
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So now I'm going to fry some onion rings, grill up some meats & seafoods and present my family with a surf & turf kind of Fourth of July.
While I do that, you can enjoy these:
- This is your brain. This is your brain on drugs.
- You know, if your arrested for chasing your boyfriend around with a sword, you probably shouldn't be allowed anywhere near a gun.
- I'm pretty sure that shit doesn't need to be contaminated to be deadly. As a matter of fact, the purer it is, the more deadly it is.
- I would like to be the first to point out the fact that penguins do not have hands.
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