The stock market is beginning to worry me

The DJIA closed at 24,272 today, up over 4,500 points since the first of the year. That's a lot of points in one year and I'm thinking it might be due for a collapse.

This makes me nervous but since I'm gainfully employed and my retirement account is strong enough to take a small hit, just not too much of a hit, I'm not terrified, just worried.

It might be time to give my finance guy a call and have a little conversation about things.

⧫

I've been watching the MLB free agent market and man, there are some seriously good ball players out there. I'm hoping the Red Sox are smart enough to stay out of the Giancarlo Stanton talks and instead are looking at who is available as a free agent.

I think they would be better served to spend money on a free agent like J.D. Martinez instead of giving away minor league prospects on a trade for Stanton.

I know I'm not the guy that makes those decisions but if Trade 'Em Away Dave wants to get ahold of me and get my advice, I'm available.

⧫

While I worry about the market and prepare to offer my sage advice to the Red Sox, you can click on these:

• Only in Florida.



• Actually, it's a pretty good idea.



• Attention scientists: Can you not do this, please. Humans are currently not within the scope of their food chain and I would prefer it to stay that way.



• This is why the internet was invented.

Seems like some guys can't keep their hands to themselves.

NBC fired Matt Lauer this morning and NPR made Garrison Keillor persona non grata this afternoon. Last week, CBS fired Charlie Rose and several months ago FOX fired Bill O'Reilly.

I keep waiting for ABC to fire that Muir guy.

Speaking of creepy old guys who can't keep their hands to themselves, John Conyers is under heat to retire or face the wrath of Psycho Nancy.

It's only a matter of time before she turns her pinched up face towards Loopy Franken.

Gentlemen, please, for the sake of all concerned, control your god-damned urges and leave the ladies alone fer cripes sake.

One woman says that during sessions on the floor, Conyers would walk over to her, bend down to whisper something in ear and run his hand up her dress.

And Franken, well he obviously likes to wait until his victims are asleep before he fondles them.

Jesus, what a couple of slimy assholes.

⧫

Here are a few links to click on:

• I'd vote for him.



• Man's got to have his beer.



• Completely justified-go-go.



• I'm betting it's a 1993 Toyota Celica low-rider with tinted windows being driven around Springfield.



• Only in Massachusetts.

I don't understand President Trump

I don't like most politicians because they all think they know what's best for me but I usually understand them. For instance, those of you that have been following this treatise since the beginning know that I hated Willard Romney for his health care laws, his increases in fees and his inability to appreciate what it was like to be a middle-class guy with three kids and lots of bills.

Despite my inability to "like" politicians, I do understand why they do what they do.

Accept for this guy.

I have no idea why he does what he does.

For instance, can someone give me one good reason why he had to bring up Elizabeth Warren at a ceremony for WWII vets?

I don't get it.

⧫

You can click on these:

• I guess she was sick of shopping.



• Yes, but she did have a very well dressed dog.



• Key phrase in this story: "...I saw this one officer, poor man..."



• Krazy Kim has fired another missile into the ocean. He must really hate that ocean.

Two hundred and forty two years equals twelve score and two years.

Twelve score and two years ago, our fathers brought forth, upon this continent, a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that "we don't give a shit about the royal family anymore"!

I was watching the news and they devoted at least 10 minutes of the broadcast to the fact that Prince Harry has decided to get married.

For the record, I think Harry and his brother, good old whats-his-name, are a couple of decent guys who aren't quite as stiff or arrogant as the rest of the family.

Having said that, why do our news people think that whenever something happens to the British royal family, they have to talk about over and over again? Who really gives a shit?

I know I don't give a shit.
Do you give a shit?
No, I didn't think you gave a shit.

⧫

See if you can find anything entertaining here:

• Why did the chicken cross the road...



• Only in Pennsylvania.



• The Right to Arm Bears.



• Nikola Tesla is still alive?

Is it just me or....

....are their fewer leaves on the ground this year?

I picked up my leaves yesterday using my lawn mower and today I see that very few leaves have fallen. Considering the winds we've been experiencing, I find this unusual because most years I would do the leaves and the next day my entire lawn would be covered again.

Maybe it's because my neighbor has decided to pick up his leaves this year. Usually, the idiot leaves them down all fall and they blow over everyone's lawn.

Maybe this is a sign that he's actually started thinking about his neighbors.

Bah, who am I kidding. He doesn't care about anyone but himself. This is a guy with a two car garage and a six car driveway who insists on parking two of his three cars in the street overnight like this was Springfield.

He's what is known in some circles as a "douche bag".

⧫

Here are some links that you can visit if you want:

• Key entry from our favorite police log: "12:43 p.m. A Columbia Falls woman reported that her neighbor’s cats walk into her house, eat her cat’s food and then swat at it. Apparently these cats have no regard for the law."



• Headline of the Month.



• Still one of the best practical jokes ever.

I guess I picked the best day

I did my leaves today and I couldn't help but notice that it was a bit windy.

I'm sure glad I flew yesterday and not today.

⧫

We delivered our daughter and her little pup to the airport at 5:30 this morning. They took off at 7:30 and were safely back in her apartment before noon.

That means I'll be in bed, snoring, before 9:00 tonight.

⧫

I'm going to find some bad television to watch.

You should look into these links:

• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Florida Criminal of the Day.



• I wonder who it got delivered to....



• I like the name. I hope they win.



• How much of an impact will a vegan boycott actually have?



• Our school administrators in action...

Outstanding day to fly.

One of my friends wanted to go flying so he joined me at noon today.

I gave him the scary talk on the way to the airport about how the air is like water with currents and waves. I explained that a commercial jet is like an 2000-passenger ocean liner on the water and the plane we were about to fly in is like a two-man rowboat on the water.

I also told him that we would take off, turn around and land in a few minutes so that he would have a chance to say, "I don't like this. let me out."

I did my pre-flight, started the aircraft and then taxi'd over to the runway. We took off just about noon and flew the pattern with three other aircraft. He did his part by pointing out the other aircraft as we made our trip around the pattern. I had an excellent smooth as glass landing and as we were taxiing back, I said, "So, how's it going? You still want to do this?" He said, "That was great! Let's do this!"

So we did.

We took off and headed east. I took him out over Belchertown so he could take pictures of his brothers house and then we flew up the center of Quabbin. Then it was over to Montague and down the river to land back at Northampton.

We had picked up a crosswind by the time we got back to the airport so my second landing involved a bit of a right crab onto the runway with some fancy footwork to get us straight as the wheels touched down. It was still a pretty damned good landing even with the crosswind.

All in all, it was a good time for all concerned. I got to fly for an hour+ and do two full stop landings and he got to experience his first flight in a small plane.

 As we were driving home he asked when he could go again so I guess he enjoyed it.

⧫

We had a very successful Thanksgiving with 2 of our 3 children joining us. We also had my wife's mom with us and it appears we all ate way too much food.

So while I continue to eat, and then digest, massive amounts of Thanksgiving leftovers, you should visit these:

• A dog, a cat and a tortoise walk into a bar....



• I'm thinking Harry Johnson is a fake name. That means I think the entire story is probably fake.



• You gotta love the rich.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Well, except for all you spammers that keep visiting this treatise from Italy, India and the Ukraine, trying to post your spammy viagra comments.

You can kiss my ass.

🦃

So for all you fer'ners' that keep reading my blather, let me enlighten you.

Thanksgiving is a celebration of a successful harvest and a commemoration of the day our ancestors got the hell out of Europe and took over the continent known as North America which eventually became Canada and the United States.

Canada has it's own Thanksgiving day but ours is better because, well, it's ours and everything we do is the best.

🦃

Here are a couple of links you can click on while I gorge myself on turkey:

• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Day.



• I don't have anything to add to this that would make it any funnier.

I think we are prepared.

I worked a half day today and when I got home, I found my wife and daughter deeply involved in meal preparation. They got everything prepared and ready to go except for the turkey. That gets done tomorrow morning.

I am a fan of Thanksgiving because I like food. Maybe a little too much....

⧫

Here are some links for you to visit:

• Only in Florida.



• Apparently not all of the puritans left England....



• Australia: I have nothing else to say.



• I believe he is still sitting on the Group W bench.



• I don't see a problem here.



• Another reason to go to Mars.

Friday is looking pretty good.

The weather is predicted to be sunny and the wind at or about 6 knots. That is pretty good flying weather. I was able to reserve a plane in the early afternoon and my plan is to get at least one hour, possibly two, in the pattern.

Hopefully the weather holds as predicted and my plan comes together nicely.

⧫

Seems to be an awful lot of rich, powerful men out there who can't keep their hands to themselves.

My problem with all of this is I can't help but wonder if some of this is over-reaction.

I realize it's probably not a popular position to take but what if some of these "sexual assaults" being reported are really nothing more than some idiot thinking that a woman is interested in him so he made a move only to find out he was wrong.

In my opinion, that's not really sexual assault, that's miscommunication.

Don't misunderstand, I think what if some man attempts to use his position to force a woman into a situation she doesn't want, he is a pig who needs to be removed from his position immediately.

I'm just not sure every one of these accusations is on the up-an-up.

And that, my friends, is a damned shame because when someone makes these things up, they water-down the severity of the real ones.

I guess only time will tell.

In the meantime, I'm just hoping no one comes forward and accuses Fred Rogers or someone like that because that would ruin my day.

⧫

Here are todays links:

• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• The best laid plans of mice and men....



• Key phrase in this story: "This does not mean we endorse the practice."



• This brings a whole new meaning to the term, "I've been Ubered"

Windy and cold.

It's beginning to look like this windy stretch is going to continue through the weekend. That means no flying for me. I won't fly when the wind is about 12 knots an it's predicted to be above that on both Saturday and Sunday.

Friday looks promising so maybe I can squeeze and hour in then.

I'll make that decision on Wednesday.

⧫

I heard a great new conspiracy today:

The pictures of the moon landing are staged.

Not because we didn't go to the moon but because when we got there, something happened that the government doesn't want us to know about.

Some people spend too much time thinking shit up.

⧫

Here are some links that you might like:

• Mug shot of the week.



• Key phrase in this upcoming suicide attempt: "...spent the last few years building a steam-powered rocket out of salvage parts in his garage."



• "God is too busy to cash your checks. Make your checks out to me."

These windy weekends suck for flying.

The last time I flew was October 21st. I had planned on putting an hour into the pattern this weekend but the wind and rain made that a bad idea.

Next weekend doesn't look great either.

Sunday may be a possibility but since that's a week away, it's just a guess. And it's not even a good guess. It's more of a wild-assed guess.

Wild-ass guesses rarely work out well but every once in a while, one does.

I'm hoping this is the one.

⧫

It's not baseball season here but it is in Australia.

The Australian Baseball League is a small collection of ball teams sponsored by Australian Baseball Federation, the American MLB and the Australian Federal Government.

You would think that since the league is sponsored by the MLB, the MLB network would carry some of the games. They used to carry them but about that was a few years ago.

Maybe they decided that showing the games being played by a league you sponsor is a bad idea.

⧫

Since the internet is closed on Sundays, I don't have much for you.

What I do have is here:

• Stay classy New Jersey. Stay classy....



• You just know some weirdo in Japan dreamed this up.

And she's home

We spent some time at Bradley Airport waiting for my daughters flight from school. Turned out that Chicago had quite the wind storm and they were experiencing delays of about 1 hour so her layover was longer than she planned.

Her flight eventually arrive, we got our hugs from our daughter and face licks from the small emergency backup dog and were safely back at home way past my bedtime.

The little dog has a great memory. Every time she walks into this house it's like she never left. She knows exactly where the treats are kept, she remembers there is a dog door her size on the porch and she remembers where her, "Hey! I want to go out! Right freakin' now!" bell is. She rings it vigorously when she needs to go out.

It's annoying but not as annoying as barking.

She also remembers to talk to me in the mornings until I give her one of the aforementioned treats.

She's quite the conversationalist.

So anyways, everyone is settled in and they will be with us for the week. Then it will be back to school for one more month when they will get their end-of-semester break and be home for a month.

⧫

And now I'm going to watch Wonder Woman.

You can click on these while I do:

• They got some tough drunk driving laws in Denmark.



• I would like to be buried with whole belly clams.



• Here's your Naked Guy In The News story.

Busy evening

Not a lot of free time this evening so how about we just get to the links:

• This is what happens when you give little boys something to draw with.



• Only in Florida.



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "1:56 p.m. A Hungry Horse resident reported that someone stole their lawnmower. Luckily for them, they’re not going to need it until spring."



• Australia: What doesn't kill ya, gets fat eating hash browns.

I'm a wizard

So I managed to configure the email reader on my wife's computer.

Seems that Apple is trying to make things easy and they automatically assume that your email provider uses standard IMAP ports. Unfortunately the only way you can change the ports is to first configure the email and let it fail. Even more unfortunate is that Apple says, "Oh, this failed! I'm going to keep on trying anyways!"

So in order to configure it and then change the ports, I lied to it. It failed immediately but created the account.

I was then able to go into the account and modify it with the correct ports and she was up & running.

She doesn't want to admit it but I'm her hero.

⧫

I have a webinar to sit through this evening so I'm going to finish this up and log in.

While I listen to Patty Wagstaff (Go ahead, google her. I'll wait.) tell me how to not lose control while I'm flying around, you can visit these links:

• What a loving family.



• Key phrase in this story: "You need to stop what you're doing and get off him."



• Oh Canada.

Apple sucks at configuration parameters

Now that my wife has a reloaded computer, we had to reconfigure her email reader.  I followed the instructions and click the "sign in" button and all I got was this window:

Note the little spinning object next to the Back button because that's all I got no matter what I did.

I believe the problem is that Charter / Spectrum wants us to change the ports for incoming and outgoing to something other than the defaults and the Mac doesn't give us that option.

I'm thinking we need to go back to the Apple store and ask them to please configure this thing for us.

⧫

So right now I am beyond frustrated and I'm calling it a night.

Here is a couple of links for you to enjoy:

• Only in Florida.



• Randy Buck would be a great name for a children's book.

The furnace saga continues

My furnace guy says he can fix the furnace but he also says it's time for us to think about upgrading to a more efficient model. I told him fix the one we have and next summer we'll look into an upgrade.

⧫

The MLB GM meetings are going on and this is when the negotiations take place for potential trades. It's also a time for agents to shop their available players to the GMs.

I'm kind of hoping that Trade 'em away Dave doesn't give the farm away but I also hope he gets a bat or two that can help push the Red Sox over the hump. They were kind of successful the last two seasons but came up just short because they kept leaving men on base.

They need that hitter who they can rely on to drive runners in.

Personally, I'm hoping they make J.D. Martinez an offer. That man knows how to hit a baseball.

⧫

Here are some links for you:

• Here's your Naked Florida Guy In The News story.



• I'm pretty sure most people cheat at Scrabble.



• Wasn't this an episode of Barney Miller?



• Only in Florida.

Nothing broke today

I neglected to inform you that I did not need a new furnace.  He was able to repair it so there's three or four grand I didn't need to spend.

I like not spending thousands of dollars.

⧫

Here's a shock - the media is lying to us again.

There are big headlines all over that say "Trump says he believes Putin instead of US Intelligence"

The problem is Trump never said he believes Putin.

What he said was,

"Every time he sees me, he says, 'I didn't do that', And I believe, I really believe, that when he tells me that, he means it. I think he is very insulted by it. I can't stand there and argue with him, I'd rather have him get out of Syria, to be honest with you. I'd rather have him, you know, work with him on the Ukraine than standing and arguing."

No where in that statement does Trump say, "I believe him".

I am not a Trump supporter so it doesn't bother me because of Trump. I'm telling this because it bothers that they would lie like that.

If they are looking for sensational headlines about Trump, all they have to do is wait a few minutes. The man says dumb stuff every day, ten times a day. They certainly don't have to make shit up.

⧫

You can visit these links while I contemplate my role in this universe:

• The New York Aaron Judges have won the Rookie of the Year award.



• Presenting this episodes Brilliant Criminal of the Week.



• I'm assuming they interviewed mostly guys.



• One less thing for me to worry about.

The Mac is back

My wife's computer is once again computing and she is a happy kid.

I however, am a little concerned that this will happen again and her data loss will be substantially worse than it was. She is a professor with a lot of documents so her loss would effect her ability to perform her work.

That would be bad.

So I'm considering the purchase of a n Apple router called a Time Machine.

It's basically a router with a 2 terrabyte hard drive that will allow us to do automatic backups of our phones, our iPads and our Macs without worrying about plugging in thumb drives or external hard drives.

I'm a large fan of automatic backups.

Besides, I've also noticed that our six year old first floor router has begun dropping out every once in a while so it might be time to replace it.

If the time machine router is extremely expensive, I've also discovered how to create my own time machine using basic and inexpensive equipment.

Either way, at some point in the very near future, I want these machines backing themselves up as needed.

I don't want her to go through that stress-filled event again.

⧫

I'm gonna make soem of my famous pizza.

While I do that, here are some links for you to visit:

• McNugget Fight would be a greta name for a 1970s midget wrestler.



• I was not aware they were macho to begin with....



• When I read this story, all I could think about was this skit.

Long day

Today was an interesting day.

My wife tried to install the recommended Macbook OS/X update from Apple and it things did not go well. Her Mac decided to stop working and when I did some interwebgoogling, I found out that the recommended solution to her problem was to bring it to a Apple store and have them fix it.

We had an appointment at an assisted living center for my mother-in-law so we packed her and my wife's Mac up in the car and went to see this place. We took the grand tour, stayed for lunch, which was pretty damned good, and spent some time talking to the manager. In the end, a deposit was placed and now we wait.

After returning my mother-in-law to back to her house, my wife and I ran up to the Apple store in Holyoke where we explained her problem and got an appointment to have someone look at her computer. The clerk said it would be 4 hours before they could look at it so we headed home.

Once at home, two of my brothers showed up and picked up one of our old couches for another brother. We also managed to get a few things done that needed doing before heading back up to the Holyoke Mall.

Once there, we managed to get my wife's glasses fixed, buy some new furniture covers and generally wander around for about 20 minutes before we got the text that said it was time for us to have the Mac looked at.

Turns out they need to keep it over night so looks like I'll be heading back up to Holyoke tomorrow.

⧫

Here are some links that I managed to find for you:

• Been a long time since we've had a Drunks on Lawnmowers story.



• Yes, alcohol was involved.



• I'm thinking this guy is gonna have a lot of explaining to do on his next visit to the gym.



• The answer is a shitload.



• You knew it was only a matter of time.

Still getting spammed.

There were 32 new comments this afternoon. That means it's time to shut off commenting.

I don't have time to deal with this crap so no more commenting. I changed the blog so only registered users can comment.

Not entirely sure that will solve the problem but if I no longer have to deal with 32 messages each evening. I'll be happy guy.

⧫

Here are some links:

• What the hell is a motorized Safeway cart?



• Presenting this weeks Brilliant Criminal of the Day.



• Oh Canada.

Spam is rampant

I had 17 new spam comments this afternoon. Most of them were boring but a few were pretty entertaining.

First up we have Hungry Man:

Right away I am going away to do my breakfast, after having my breakfast coming over again to read additional news.

He was followed by The Shmoozer:

Thanks for some other wonderful post. Where else may just anyone get that type of info in such an ideal means of writing? I've a presentation next week, and I am at the look for such info.

Not be outdone, here is The Moocher:

An impressive share! I have just forwarded this onto a colleague who had been conducting a little research on this. And he in fact ordered me lunch because I found it for him...
lol. So let me reword this.... Thanks for the meal!!
But yeah, thanks for spending some time to discuss this subject here on your web site.

Finally, we have My Newest Friend:

You, my pal, ROCK! I found just the info I already searched all over the place and just could not come across.
What an ideal website.

I get the best spam.

⧫

Here are some links:

• They got some nice crooks in Houston.



• Ouch.



• Australia: What doesn't kill ya tries to kill your meter reader.



• Pumpkin Spice is finally good for something.

I think I need a new furnace

My furnace started leaking from the pressure expansion valve a couple of weeks ago. Not much, just a drip that came to about a gallon in a 24 hour period. Then it started getting worse and yesterday, I noticed that when the furnace is running, the pressure goes up to almost 35psi. The expansion valve is set to go off at 30psi.

I sent this information off to my furnace guy, who is coming on Friday to check things out, and the reply I got was,

"Ok, so the relief valve is doing its job. It's only a 30psi valve. So either the boiler is over filling itself or, hopefully not, the coil could have a pinhole in it"

I didn't hear anymore from him but I assume that "the coil may have a pinhole" thing is bad and probably not repairable.

I'm praying for an easy, low cost repair but I'm planning on buying a new furnace.

⧫

Here are todays links:

• He stole the whole bridge?



• Key lie in this story: "Ric Flair claims he slept with more than 10,000 women..."



• Key phrase in this story: "...he looked around and seemed very confused."



• Hairy Crab Vending Machine would be a pretty good name for a 1990s techno band.



• This was not a well thought out headline.



• I would kill someone that did this to my dog.

I've worked with an unstable guy

His name was Chris and man, was he screwed up. He was paranoid, he was depressed, he was a little psychotic and he was angry all the time. He swore that there were terrorists on the Connecticut river and he wanted to get a boat, mount a gun on it and patrol the river.

Oh, and he had guns. A lot of guns. He also may have been in possession of a fully automatic weapon that he kept calling his "M-16".

Basically, this guy was full tilt bozos. And when I talked to my boss about him, I suggested that I was going to bring it up to company security because I did not want to end up as a chalk outline under my desk. My boss told me that I shouldn't do that because it would cause a lot of trouble for the guy.

To this day I still think I should have talked to someone about this guy.

He was eventually let go by the company and he drifted away from my world. I learned later that he got himself some help and seemed to be fairly stable but he still had all those guns.

In light of what happened in Texas, I can't help but think how close we came to a situation that could have gone very badly.

People like that should not have guns.

Hell, people like that should not have cars.

⧫

Here are some links that I found:

• As pranks go, this is one of the better ones.



• Violent Thermostat Spat would be a great name for war novel involving teenagers.



• Only in Florida.



• Also only in Florida.



• We don't pay cops enough.

I'm tired

I dislike these time changes.

I managed to stay awake until 9:30 last night and I'm goign to force myself to do it again tonight but my body thinks it's 10:30.

10:30 is way past my bedtime.

⧫

Our furnace developed a slight leak from the pressure relief valve about a week ago. My furnace guy, Bobby, will be here later this week to fix it and make sure all is well with the furnace.

As things stand right now, that furnace tuneup will be the last major winter readiness task here at the Daily News^© World Headquarters.

I changed the oil on The Beast yesterday and I changed the oil on the generator the other day. I took the roof rake out of the garage rafters so it's available when needed.

The last thing that needs to happen to make my winter life complete is I need to go buy a couple of new snow shovels. The ones I have are worn out.

Ain't nobody got time for worn out snow shovels.

⧫

Here are some links you can click on if you want to:

• Best sales pitch ever.



• If I see one of these things in my backyard, I'm just gonna hit it with a hammer. If that doesn't work, I'm gonna sell my house.



• Australia: What doesn't kill ya takes up residence in your kitchen tries to bake you a cake.

Time changes screw with me.

Back in another era of my life I traveled a lot between California and Massachusetts. I would leave from home on a Sunday afternoon, fly to LA or San Francisco, spend four days working on an office and then fly back on Thursday night/Friday morning. This usually happened at least once a month, sometimes twice.

I hated it.

I hated it because I was away from my growing family for a lot of time, leaving my wife alone to take care of the kids and the house.

I also hated it because the time zone changes screwed with me.

A lot.

I was constantly tired and my sleep schedule was screwed up fair-the-well.

Thankfully now-a-days I only have to put up with time changes twice a year.

And for the record, I do not miss sitting in a narrow silver tube with 200 pissed-off people for 7 or 8 hours, then spending 4 nights in a hotel room only to get back into a silver tube for another 7 or 8 hours.

I like the fact  that every weekday, I only have to drive for 20 minutes in the morning to get to the office and then another 20 minutes in the afternoon to get home again. And it's just me in the car, listening to sports talk radio.

⧫

The Patriots are on a bye week this week so my football watching was fairly limited. I do have a couple of Netflix DVDs to watch so maybe I'll put one of them in the machine and then swear at the fact I can't click through the 100 previews.

While I do that, you can think about the meaning of life while clicking on these links:

• Key advice in this story: "Please do not open beer bottles with pepper spray cartridges."



• Australia: What doesn't kill ya, messes with your food.



• If you or I had done this, we'd be in jail for voyeurism.



• Key line in this story: "Douglas Goldsberry, who masturbated while watching from his kitchen."

Gold Rush ain't what it used to be.

I'm three episodes into this season and so far it's a lot of drama and a little mining. I might have to find a new series to watch this fall.

⧫

I don't have a lot to blab about today so here are some links:

• I realize this is probably fake but the best line in it is: "These assaults caused him numerous genuine wounds, including the loss of two fingers and one gonad, gnawed off by his assailants."



• Only in Florida.



• Also only in Florida.



• Their babies will be called duppies.

No baseball, no football.

And I'm running out of DVRs. I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do for my television viewing experience tonight.

Maybe I'll spend my time cruising around youtube, looking at woodworking or flying videos.

⧫

I'm going to try and stay awake past 8:30 tonight.

While I do that, you can click on these:

• Key line in this story: "...found Pouncy with two gunshot wounds, one to the right thigh and one to the penis..."



• Oh Canada.



• Wasn't this a movie starring Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson?



• Australia: What doesn't kill ya, kills ya.

I did not see the Astros win.

I made it through 5 innings last night before nodding off and heading up to bed. It looked pretty good for the Astros so I didn't really think I was going to miss much.

Turns out I was right.

⧫

I'm probably going to watch some DVRs and fall asleep early.

While I do that, you can do these:

• Key phrase in this story: "We didn't do anything with it all summer! It just grew and it grew and it grew..."



• He must have really wanted that eggermuffin.



• Key message in this video: "Warning: Do not try and copy anything seen in this video."



• Oh Canada.



• Key entry from our favorite police log: "2:35 p.m. A Kalispell man reported that he did not know he needed to remove his license plates when he sold his van last fall. Now he’s getting a bunch of parking tickets in his name and he does not know what to do."

Russian Trolls.

ABC ran a news story called "Russian Trolls" about how Russia influenced the election. Turns out they did it telling people they could vote by texting their choice to a sms number.

I would like to point out that if anyone fell for a facebook posting that said you could vote by texting your vote, they deserve what they got. Stupid people being duped into doing something stupid is not "influencing the election". It's more like Survival of the Fittest.

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The final game of the World Series is on tonight and I'll watch a couple of innings.

This whole "8:20 start time" is not only a pain in the ass, it's also a lie. I bet a dollar that first pitch won't be thrown until 8:30 because those dingbats on Fox love the sounds of their own voice and they will blab about things that have no meaning to any of us.

And once they are through yapping, someone will let the umpire know that it's time to start and he'll tell the pitcher to pitch.

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You might like these:

• I'm pretty sure this is a terrible form of bribery...



• Only in Florida.
  (And she was probably justified)



• Holy Crap!