Sunday, July 21, 2019

My car is retarded.

I have an old car. It's 15 years old, to be precise. I have an old car because I like this car. It runs like a champ and after 15 years, the drivers seat has molded itself to my ass. I also like not having any car payments.

Anyways, there is a small two-line display that gives me information when things go wrong and that was how I knew the headlamp was out. The display also told me I had a "position light bulb failure".

Now, I know what a running light is, I know what a tail light is, I know what a head light is, I know what backup light is and I know what a turn signal is. I have never heard of a position light.

I assumed it was those little marker lights on the corners of the car but when I looked, all four of those little lights were burning brightly, as was every other light on my car. Yet the message persisted.

Turns out, after several hours of staring, poking, testing and soldering, the "position light" is actually a tail light.

See, my car has four light bulbs for its tail lights and after a lot of additional staring, I found that one of those four bulbs is burned out. Goddammit!

How hard would it have been to say, "Tail light bulb failure" instead of position light?

I figure that the message is either a lie or it's possible that my car may be mildly retarded.

I'm going with retarded.


Red Sox won in fine style last night, beating the Orioles 17-6.

Yay! Good game boys!

The Red Sox got shut out 5-0 today.

Boo! You suck!

Also, we got our second look at Cashner. Suffice to say it was not a good second look. I'd go so far as to say it might have been worse than the first look we had of him. At this point, I'm starting to think that maybe Cashner wasn't worth the two low-end prospects they traded for him.

His next outing better be way better than his first two.


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