Monday, November 23, 2020

Let the Christmas shopping begin

I went out and bought myself a new shaver today. When I got home, I told my wife, "This is my Christmas present. Do you want to wrap it or can I just go plug it in and get it charged so I can shave tomorrow morning?"

She told me to just plug it in.

And that, my friends, is the best way to go Christmas shopping. Go buy what you want for yourself and tell your spouse, "This is what you got me." No one has to stress over finding the perfect gift and no one has to lie & say, "Oh, it's just what I wanted!"

My wife, however, likes to be surprised. She won't buy herself a nice present. So I told my daughter, "Find something nice for mom and tell me how much I owe you."

My daughter is a saint.


No, Trump still hasn't admitted he lost.

I have a feeling that on January 20th, five guys in black suits are gonna show up at the White House and carry him, kicking & screaming like the child that he is, out to the curb on Pennsylvania Ave and toss him unceremoniously into the gutter.

I hope they film it because that would be funny to watch.


I am not going to watch any football this evening simply because it's on too late.

As far as I'm concerned, all sporting events should start no later than 7:00pm eastern time.

Now, you kids get of my lawn! And someone find out what the early bird special is down at the diner...


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